Marriage material

   I just came across an article about a woman in Malaysia , Mrs. Wook Kundor, who is 107 years old wanting to leave her 37 year old husband, Muhammad Noor Che Musad, because she fears he might abandon her for a younger woman. The most impressive part is that at that age she can still remember that she’s a crucial player in a love triangle. They got married four years ago. She said that she has been feeling insecure lately and needs to find out whether he still loves her or not. I quote: "Lately, there is this kind of insecurity in me.” I realize that I am an aged woman. I don't have the body nor am I a young woman who can attract anyone.” Really grandma? You just came to this realization now? Just a measly four years ago you were not aged and had the right kind of body to attract someone. Those last four years must’ve been hard on you to lose your looks like that. Maybe the fact that you had 22 husbands had something to do with it. I can’t fathom having to keep up with all these Mr. Wrongs let alone to find the time to have a marriage and divorce ceremony with each of them. No wonder your looks have withered. Look at Liz Taylor and she only had seven husbands. No worries, you still got it in you to squeeze in a few more. Keep looking. Register on a dating website. Call the village matchmaker. It’s not too late.

    While this woman was just doing what any other hot-blooded 107 year old woman would do if she could, I cannot begin to imagine what this husband’s problem was. He was just 34 when he married this mummy. How hopeless was his situation? Did his parents throw him out of the house? Was he jobless and needed someone to support him? You be the judge. He did say this: “it was God's will that we fell in love”. You mean it wasn’t her body? Is ‘God’s will’ secret code for gerontophilia? Why don’t you tell it like it is buddy, we’ll understand.

    Currently he is in rehab voluntarily seeking treatment for drug addiction. Coincidentally the old woman’s fears surfaced. Obviously she was keeping him locked in the basement on some serious “medication”. She clearly had high self esteem but it certainly helped to slip some concoction she’s been working on since before his parents were born into his cup every now and then to keep their marriage alive (along with herself). Talk about lying about your age. At 107 it’s not even appropriate for this kind of deceitful behavior. Normally people can get away with shaving five or even ten years off their real age but in this case even if you take off thirty you’re not fooling anybody. On their wedding night she said “I have a confession to make I am 103 and not 85 like a told you when we first met.” That’s when he turned to drugs. Now that he’s trying to sober up she’s already looking for lucky victim #23. Find me one too while you’re at it Mrs. Kundor.