GW

Global warming is upon us people. We’re on a slippery slope bobsledding 90mph in Vancouver (we all know how safe those tracks are). The Olympics are so trouble-free this year that there’s almost nothing to talk about, so we’re left with the topic of global warming. Maybe that’s the reason Vancouver is having issues. Blame it on the A-A-A-, I mean GW (global warming and not our former president). Actually may as well blame him. He already ruined America and now he’s on a mission up the continent until he reaches the source of our suffering. After ruthlessly rampaging Canada, he will get to the axis of all evil (North pole) and melt the ice personally. I can’t believe that I’ve uncovered his plot and connected the Olympics fiasco with global warming. I’m a freaking genius!
Seriously, what’s up with this weather? According to Facebook, everyone is sick of it. Uggs are ruined, views from windows are distorted, people can’t travel/commute. I’m so pissed that I’m going to hang a platinum medal around my neck in opposition. GW may have the gold but my brain’s techniques were more technically challenging.
• This entry was not written by anyone from the Al Gore camp or Al Gore himself (I know how this looks since Al Gore is a strong opponent of both global warming and GWB)